My poor little daughter

As most of you know already, I have a four year old daughter. This morning she experienced some diareha, and complained of a stomach ache. By the time lunch time had rolled around, she was feeling alot better and didn't seem to be acting any different so I continued with our plans of picking up my friends daughter (shes almost four and they just moved close by) to see that new Rataoullie movie that just came out. We had popcorn and pop and she just keep asking if we could head to the other girls house to play. I made her sit through the entire movie (which she complained off an on) but we did it. I laughed pretty hard and enjoyed the movie, my daughter on the other hand, didn't enjoy it as much. She laughed, but I think that it might have been a bit too long for her (almost 2 hours!!)

We took my friends daughter home and helped them unpack, and then headed home for dinner. my daughter started to complain about how tired she was, and that she wanted to nap. I made her some Mac and cheese (one of my favs too! lol) and she ate about half of it, and laid down on the couch. Not even two hours later, she came racing in to the computer room and ended up throwing up in the hallway. If any of you knew us in real life, you would know that this is only the SECOND time in her four years that she has actually puked. Poor little girl! I bathed her and put her to bed. Shes sound asleep and hoping that she is feeling better for tomorrow.

Because i live in canada, tomorrow (July 1) is "canada day" and its usually a big celebration. We moved to this smaller city and it seems they put on events fo the famlies out here.. and best of all.. they are usually FREE events! When does that ever happen now a days? So if shes feeling better, would love to take her to the pancake breakfast.

I did manage to get quite a few emails done tonight which I am really happy about and hope to do the same for tomorrow night, and monday night as well. Cross your fingers everyone that my daughter just had an upset tummy and that its not the flu! I dont want to be sick! Fingers crossed!!

PS.. if anyone knows how to clean puke off of the cat, I am all ears:) The little kitty ran right through and slide through it, Already took a wet cloth to her, but still kinda smells!

Inspiration Storey

you know how sometimes when your "with" someone in a relationship and often wonder if your with the right guy/gal? sometimes there are "signs" to show you the answer if you just look.... Todays inspiration is someone who went through this exact samething, only to have something dramatic happen that gave her answer in a flash.

I am not sure if anyone else has watched Evan Almighty yet (its HILARIOUS) but a line in the movie says "if you pray for courage, does God give you courage, or does he give you opportunity to be courageous?" There are few other points in the movie that say the samething but this really struck a chord with me. Often we pray for certain "things" and dont' realize that its has been granted. maybe not in the way we have asked, but the "opportunity" or "answer" is right in front of your face:)


my husband and i have been married for a little over four years now, but about six months after our wedding he got really sick and i almost lost him. it was the last sunday in november of 2003 when we had to head to the ER because his abdomen was distended and he was retaining fuilds in his leg and face( i at first thought that he was just getting fat, you know with his new life as a married man and all) he had liver failure and needed a transplant as soon as possible.this was a difficult time in our lives because i was at a point where i started to wonder if i had made a mistake in marrying him. i went throuhg nights of wondering if there was something that i had done wrong in my life that i was subsequently being punished for. since he had to be admitted to a hospital bed and could not move around as much and we both live atleast seven hours from any of our relative, i had to take over and take charge of everything. i remember saying to myself that this was not what i picture my life as a married woman to be. i had to work and make it to the hospital each day to visit and help take care of him for the entire time he was at the hospital. there were time when i would fall asleep at the wheel while driving from the visit late at night. well, he was sent home with some medications after two weeks and had to wait for an appointment to see the specialist who would check him out and make recommendations. the frist week home was very scary so i had to take hime to a babysitter before living for work each day, there were times when he could not remember where he was or what he did( this was a 30 year old man at the time). i had to be up with him whenever he got up to go to the bathroom, which was every hour( as a result of one of the medications he was placed on). on one night after he was sent home, i had a very scary episode and i had to make a 911 call for an ambulance. he was sitting on the commode and fainted right there, i did not know whatelse to do but reach for the telephone admist tears and dail 911. when the ambulance got there and after reviving him, they told me that his sugar was too low and that was the reason for his state. his appointment finally came around and he was admitted as soon as we got there because he was getting worst at that point, our insurance company was also refusing to pay for his stay and treatment at the hospital( so that was another promblem that i had to deal with ). the insurance was finally taken care of after our lawyer contacted them and after two months stay at the hospital, my husband was bless enought to get a donor and had a liver transplant and back on the road to recovery.
whenever i'm asked how i made it throught i still tell people that i tried to remember that the shoe could have been on the other foot, and i would like to be treated the way i treat others.i believe that it was the grace of God that got me throught it all, because there were days when i got on my kneeds in tears asking God why me why him? as i went through everything, i realized that it was a previlage for me to experience something like that( i know, crazy right?). i came to realize that i was stronger than i thought and my husband needed me to be stronger for the both of us. i also think that the strong support of our family, friend in the church and my neighbourhood made a definate impact in our lives.
today Joe is doing well, there were a few minor setbacks after his surgery that took him back to the hospital for a few days at a time and he had to have another intestinal surgary in november of last year to remove some adhesions; but he has been doing a whole lot better and has setup his own photo studio and is also trying to get back to a partime job as well.
i thank God everytime for giving back my husband and for the opportunity to have gone through what i went through, because i know that i'm stronger because of what i had to go through.
i believe that there is a time and a reason for everything that happens in a person's life, and i always remind brides to take every line of their vows seriously, because most time when you're standing before the officient and he/she says .....in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer... think seriously before answering 'I DO" because sickness or poorer might just be aroun the bend. and i always try to remember why i agreeed to be his wife and that kept/keeps me going each day.

Also a bit of an update from me. Starting the first week in July I am officially will no longer be working fulltime at my "office" job and now doing part time work instead. This will allow me to more focus on my emails, keeping them uptodate and helping as many people as I can during the day. I should be caught up within a few days and hopefully stay that way. I also want to thank all you ladies/gentlemen for your paitence and kindness while I got this sorted out:)

We Hired someone!!!!

after having to do two more interviews today so that my boss could be sure that we made the right decsion, she called the references and talked to someone that she also trusts, we called the girl and offered her the position! So shes going to start on monday, she will be fulltime for the one week while I train her, and then after that I go part time! I am hoping that we can work it where I go three days one week and she goes two, and then we switch.. that would work out for me, so hopefully it will work for her too!.

So, at that point, I should be able to get caught up within that first week of working part time as I will have the whole day to dedicate to answering the emails and finally get caught up!

I hope that you guys all have a great weekend!

Endometriosis

I am sure that some of you suffer from Endometriosis and they actually say that over the years that there has been an increase in cases of women suffering with this. I do know that it does cause problems with ttc. I did a reading earlier for someone and was instantly told that they needed to take something to "stop" it. I wasn't sure if it was even a "product" on the market just yet, or in the early stages. (which means just coming out, or not alot of people know about it) which lead me to google it to see if I could find what they were showing me.

I feel that this is to be taken orally, and that although surgery for Endo is common, there are alot of cases that seem to "grow" back faster than the drs think and still mess with the ttc efforts.

This site http://www.goodbyeendo.com/ has some good information. The information all seems to connect to "Natural Progesterone" being used to basically "halt' or "improve" Endometriosis. They are saying that there is too much Estrogen in the foods we eat, that it basically "feeds" the endo.

So perhaps those of you who suffer from this, perhaps trying to find foods that increase the levels of estrogen in your body, you should try and avoid those during the months of ttc. The website listed above does sell a product that is supposed to help, along with providing a list of foods that contain , I am not "endorsing' this site specifically but perhaps putting out there that there are options when suffering from Endo that you can try and see if it works for you!

Another article while using google that I thought was worth the read http://www.doctoryourself.com/endometriosis.html

So if you suffer from Endo, consult your dr with options that are open to you, and perhaps try and avoid foods that have alot of estrogen in them!

A post of sorts!

Well as promised on Wednesdays I will post a storey of inspiration, usually submitted by someone else, or will post some of my own. I hope that you will take what you will from it, learn, and enjoy reading it, knowing that your not alone in what takes place in life and can always seek comfort from the ones around you.

Todays inspirational storey is about someones struggles with depression, and their battle and understanding of it. Its very powerfully written, and she will be an amazing writer some day soon. I have never suffered from depression, but have been close to those who have, so this storey of inspirtation is for you. (My mom suffered from severe depression from the time I was young till I turned 21. Proud to say she has it beat!)


Depression is an act of depressing something. In my life, I was depressing emotions. Not only fear, anger, and hate, but I also depressed love, joy, and happiness. As I continued to alienate my emotions from my mind, I fell hard and fast into the depths of despair. I was no longer living life I was surviving it.
When you begin the process of healing, it changes the family dynamics or the roles within a relationship, especially as it relates to childhood sexual trauma. When the journey towards healing begins for the person who suffers from PTSD, they will come face-to-face with the demons they have buried. Part of the healing journey is coming to terms with the abuse suffered and those who perpetuated the abuse most likely will never admit to their wrongdoing
I have suffered the pains of child abuse from my parents. I remember walking to elementary school, alone, wondering if anyone else knew what was happening to me. I was afraid to make friends because then they would want to come over and play and I did not want anybody to come over and get hurt the way I was hurt. I became a great student getting excellent grades, but my social skills sucked. I made it through my teenage years and into adulthood, but the effects of abuse colored every choice I made in my life. After several years of trying to untangle the web of abuse around me I realized I could not do this alone. I put aside my pride and decided to seek help. I tried several different types of therapy. The reason it took several attempts is because I did not know really what was wrong with me. Only that it had to have something to do with the abuse I experienced in my life.

It is important to remember that your first choice of treatment may not be the one best suited for your recovery. Do not give up keep trying various methods. As difficult, as it sounds today you will be able to move through surviving life and begin thriving with all the joys life has to offer you.

The treatment that brought me from living in a negative mindset was “Art Therapy.” Let me tell you, this was not easy, especially since I thought I actually had to draw, which I cannot do. I was terrified. However, when I walked into the room, it was so peaceful, no demands. In time, I began to do the art, which consisted of simply sitting down at a large table and choose any medium I wanted. I could color, use clay, paint, even finger paint if I wanted. The first few things I drew were on very large pieces of paper. In the center was a very tiny dot of yellow and then the entire paper was filled with black paint. Several months later the “tiny yellow dot” became bigger and the “blackness” began to disappear. I did not realize how important this was at the time, but now I know that I was cleansing the negative effects of abuse from not only my mind but also my soul.

I began to walk into the room and light a candle, my way of preparing the space for the healing that was taking place. By the end I became thankful for my experiences and that I was alive and that I had a purpose.Besides using the art, I also began using my writing during therapy. I have a tendency to stay in my head. It was my way of not becoming emotional. I learned though that the healing came through my emotions. At first my writing was angry. I was angry at not only my family for what happened, but I was angry at the world. I learned I was angry at me. Then the floodgate of tears began coming and I could not stop them. It was such a release to read my words out loud and hear the pain I had held inside for so many years.

I still love to write. I desire that the pain expressed in my words only serves the purpose to bring the reader to find the joy in their own life. Today, I start each day by lighting a white candle and surrounding myself with the positive energy of white light. I do morning meditations to center myself for the tasks that the day may bring. I also exercise three times per week, which is a great release when I have days that still feel a bit lumpy.


I have to say, that when I was going through my healing I never thought a day would come when I could look back on my abuse and not cringe. Today, I can. Today, I can acknowledge that awful things happened to me and I can smile. I can smile because I am not only living life, I am thriving in life. When I feel tears well up in my eyes, I embrace them. I no longer shun emotions, I welcome them. I have learned that to live life, you have to feel life. I can honestly say that I would rather feel life in all of its colors than to live in a world void of emotions

Anastasia

In regards to other news, looks like we might have found the person to take over on part time basis for me at work so I can work part time as well. My boss would like to do a few more interviews, but I am pretty sure we are going with this one (I had her picked the minute her resume came in!) So, from what I am told if she accepts the position, she will be able to start immediately. That means 2 weeks of training and then I can start working part time!!!