we put my mom to "rest" so to speak. We had a wonderful celebration of life for her today.I must admit I was really beside myself on my way there. Trying to breathe deep and just relax. I knew it was going to be hard today and emotional and it was. I do have to say that it was perfect.. amazing. There was so many people there to support our family and show their love for my mother. I was truly touched.
While talking with a few friends towards the end, I felt someone tap the top of my head. I turned to say hello... no one was there. I turned again to my two friends who I had just chatted with and asked them if they saw anyone tap me. They both looked at me a little strange and said no. So I turned again, no one was close enough to have tapped me even as a joke, and both of my friends insist no one was there. So perhaps my mother?
Awhile ago my sister commented that she wished this happened to someone else. I explained that although I would love to have my mother back, I would NOT wish this on anyone, nor could I wish it was someone else. I realize that everyone has a "time" to go, and it was my mom's. I am slowly starting to accept that shes gone from this world, and knowing that shes in transition to head back home. I feel at peace, knowing that I have the memories I do. I am in the middle of collecting pictures I have of her, in the hopes of making a scrapbook of my memories of her. Being able to show my daughters who their grandmother was. My youngest is almost 2 and my eldest almost 7. Its likely they wont remember much about her as the time goes on if anything, so it will be nice to have and show them what a wonderful person she was. She warms my heart even still.
So if I can offer one piece of advice, for those of you who have your parent(s) still here, ensure you take pictures often, ensure you spend time with them, ensure you say what is in your mind and heart.. You never really know when its time to "go" and all the things you wish you could have shared when they were still here.
This week, will start back with the giveaways on the blog. I am almost caught up with readings from the past two weeks where I found myself behind.
Thanks everyone for all of the support and kindness you have all shown me in the past two weeks. Its something that I will always remember.
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10 comments:
That's wonderful that the service was beautiful and I know that your mommy appreciates it. I bet that was her taping you on the head :o) That sounds like something my mom would do..lol My parents are still alive and I dread the day they have to "go home." It will be very hard, but in the end, I know that they will be with my sons watching over us from a beautiful place. Scrapbooks are wonderful ways to share memories of loves. I am still collecting stickers, etc...for my sons' book. Cheri, we are glad to have you "back," but remember that we can wait if you still need time :o)
I am glad everything went well, sounds like you are doing better. (((hugs)))
I'm glad it was a wonderful celebration and I think she probably was the one giving you a tap. I'm sure she appreciated the celebration of her life, it is so much better to focus on how they were when they were alive.
Thank you for the advice too. I've been emotional when it comes to death and try to get a ton of pictures of my mother when she visits and even more with her and my son together. I also try getting pictures of me in pictures so my son will be able to see them. It's rough missing them, but good to have pictures and reminders.
Best wishes :)
(((HUGS))) What wonderful advice about the pictures. I love looking back at pictures of my deceased grandmother. They remind me of how much I lvoed her adn what a wonderful person she was. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Hi Cheri
Just reading your blog today brought memories of my mothers service. I too was so beside myself before hand, not sure if i was able to hold it together. My daughter was a few months old and i was just so full of emotions. I guess after the funeral we had gone back to my dad place. And we were all sitting around. And all of a sudden the lights started flickering. I just knew it was her. Everybody that knew her said the same thing. We had this thing about flickering lights (she also would say it was her mom or dad when this happened when she was living). Anyway big hugs to you!
Lynn
I'm glad the celebration was beautiful. And I bet she did tap you on the head to remind you she's not as far away as you think. After some family members that's passed and didn't have enough photos of me and them together. I want to take more photos of my little boy with his grandparents, aunts and even me and his dad. So my son can always look back how much his family loves him even when we pass on.
May she rest in peace.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I remember losing my great grandmother when I was about the same age as your oldest daughter. You would think that a child would not remember, but you do. I remember the funeral vividly. i remember the heat of the church, wich did not have AC, the dusty country road leading to the cemetory, and most of all I remember her kindness. I don't have a lot of memories of of her, but the few that I retain are good and they make me smile. I would probably guess if I had lived in the same state as her and not a 20 hour drive away I would have more memories. The time that your children had with your mother has and will impact them more than you could imagine.
Havent "heard" from you in a while, hope all is well.. (((hugs)))
My grandma lost her ability to speak with I was one and died when I was almost 8. I just wanted to say that although it was hard to know her well (since she couldn't talk) I have very clear memories of her. So I am sure your oldest daughter will have memories as well!
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