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Monday, August 20, 2007

Everything happens for a reason

I think that this is one of my most favorite quotes. I truely do believe that everything happens for a reason. Although we may not understand at the moment what that "reason" might be its often later in our life that it really becomes apparant on why we went through what we did and how it tied in later in life.

I think that there are alot of "coincedences" that come in our life, that people often just toss off as just that a "coincedence" rather than what it truely is. Its part of our path.

For example, ever since I was 16, I began telling my friends that I would marry a man I met in a bar. At the age of 20 years old, I met that man. We got along amazingly well, we had fun, and I just "knew" it would be him. We dated for 3 months, he ended up moving at the same time I had my cell phone disconnected. He lost his phone book during the move and we lost contact.. I was heart broken. I thought it was him, and it was hard for the next three months not knowing why he was not calling etc. I finally "gave up" so to speak and "moved on". Not really know what happened, but accepting it. Well three months later, I was to goto this comedy club with a friend and we always would see the early show and then head to the night club about a 10 min drive. This one night we were running late, and missed the early show so had to see the late show. When you buy tickets for this particular show, they let you into the night club next door for free. So we headed over to waste about 45 min playing pool while we waited for our show. As we were getting ready to leave, I looked to my right, sitting there with a bunch of my friends was my now husband. After reconnecting, it was just as it was before, he explained about losing his phonebook and my cellphone being off. We have been together now for 11 years and married for 6 of those years. I was not supposed to be there that night, it was by "chance" I was there, but I think that greater things were at work.

Same thing with what happened to me on Friday. I had booked a hair appt, as my current do was needing to be re-highlighted and cut/styled as I was feeling "old" Lol. I booked the appt for 1pm that day, arranged care for my 4 year old. Well that morning, my friend asked if she could drop off her two kids so she could possibly go and have her baby (had a planned c-section, but was having issues) anyways, due to delays with my friend and the dr's not knowing if they would or wouldn't do the c-section that day, I had to cancel my hair appt. I asked to change it, and she asked if it had to be the same person or did it matter. As I had not specified a person in the first place, I said it would not matter. My hair appt was changed to Saturday at 3pm.

During the hair appt, I am normally not a talker, not sure what to talk about and usually just answer questions or small talk. Well there was a connection with this girl. She was so sweet and nice, and very relaxed, and turns out she does alot of the same things as me, she knows Reiki, and has her own gifts shes aware of, and pursues alot of the same things. Recently getting into EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique I posted about below) and we just really connected. Found out that our husbands have similar interests.

So again, life has a way of connecting things, sending you on your path, and presenting you with situations with which to learn. Not only did I possibly make a new friend, but also someone to learn from and perhaps she can learn from me too.

Not everything that happens in our life is good, but perhaps take a step back and see where this path is leading you, perhaps this situation has been presented before and you just did not realize it. Perhaps you become friends with someone , loose contact, only to find each other again a short time later. Or perhaps you ended up running late, that everything you did seemed to go wrong, only to find out later, had you been on time, that you would have been in a car accident or seriously hurt. Take the Twin Tower event of Sept 11. There were many people that were "supposed" to be at work that day, and for one reason or another were not.

Everything happens for a reason and has a way of working out. Its up to us to learn from it and make these connections. The more aware you are of it, the easier it will be to make these connections.

If anyone ever has any questions, or comments about a blog entry feel free to write in the comment section and I will try to answer. I love hearing about other peoples experiences as well. If you can't post in the comment section (I think that you have to have a gmail account, feel free to email me at Cheri22@gmail.com and write BLOG in the subject line so I know its a question/comment pertaining to a post)

7 comments:

Lynn said...

Hi Cheri

I have always believed that statement! My grandmother used to always tell me that! Thanks to her I've always kept that close to my heart. (And of course they're are things that you just don't know why they are happening and you ask yourself why me!) This topic got me to thinking of a book I read from Sylvia Browne (famous psychic) that there are signs that we see everyday that mean something, but we don't always catch it, or take it as coincidence. (I think that's how I took it when I read it!).

Lynn

Cheri22 said...

I know who Sylvia Browne is, I have read some of her books.

I really love that quote, as it means alot of things to alot of people. Its often very calming to realize that although its not known exactly why its happening, but it will, and it will sort itself out.

My next favorite quote along the same lines is "it could be worse!". I always try to look at the glass half full. Always knowing that there are people experiencing worse things, or the situation I am in could have been a lot worse. Perhaps its a "Defense" mechanism, so I dont feel overwhelmed sometimes.
THanks for sharing about your grandmother and your feelings about it!

Choco Mama said...

Cheri,
I have been finding that out more and more lately. Just last Saturday, my friend invited me out to dinner with her and two of our other friends at my favorite restaurant. Me and my partner were supposed to go see a movie earlier in the day, and then I would go out with my friends. Well, we missed the movie and ended up seeing a later one so I missed going out with my friends. Good thing I did, because I have been TTC for a year (unknown to her) and at dinner she announced that she was pregnant (which is a bad position for her to be in, considering her circumstances). At first, I was disappointed about not being able to see my friends and eat at my favorite restaurant, but in the end I was SO glad, because I don't know how I would've taken the situation in person!

Cheri22 said...

Hi Andrea,

It really is sometimes a good thing when things work out for the best. It just shows you how things happen for a reason, and to be "accepting" of the situations as they arise, as things will have a way of working out. Almost like someone is at work helping and protecting and trying to make sure that your stay to your path. I believe that most times its our loved ones helping us who have passed over. Your spirit guides are meant to help guide you, but also allow you to make your own mistakes, your loved ones, want to help, and try to "steer' you in the right direction, you just have to be looking for the signs:)

Thanks for sharing!

Jamie said...

Béla and I had not been trying to conceive when we did in September of 2005. It was an unexpected but not unwanted pregnancy. A day after I got the first BFP I started miscarrying....October 4, 2005 was the day I started bleeding with my miscarriage.

In addition to it being a painful physical experience (I was cramping very badly) it was an emotionally devastating one. It was my first miscarriage and I struggled with the whys and hows and was very sad that we would never meet that baby. It hit me...hard...when I started miscarrying how very badly I wanted another baby, my last, I told myself. I started hoping praying and crying for a baby. I started reading absolutely everything there was to read on TTC, even consulted with psychics to get conception predictions.

Shortly before the one year anniversary of our miscarriage I threw around the idea of using condoms to prevent possible conception from late August up until my cycle that would start around Halloween. My thought process was that being a way to remember and honor the baby we lost. By preventing during that time we would not conceive around the time our angel baby was conceived, and we wouldn't be due around the time our angel baby was due. We got a lot of great advice from women and ended up deciding to prevent until my cycle started in October.

As the one year anniversary of our miscarriage approached with no baby growing in my belly I began to get depressed and decided that what God meant to happen would happen in His time...if He decided to bless us with a baby conceived around the time our angel was conceived or born around the time our angel baby was due I'd take it with a thankful heart.

Having never had to try to conceive I decided it was about time to try something! So I started OPKs. I was insanely excited when I got my OPKs in the mail for the first time (Hi, my name is Jamie and I'm a poas-aholic!) lol.

To add insult to injury 6 days after the one year anniversary of our miscarriage I was told by my internal medicine doctor that I had a uterine fibroid. Due to severe cramping for months I went to my doctor and they actually thought I had a kidney stone but ended up finding the fibroid on the tests they sent me for. Though it wasn't that big compared to other fibroids --mine only measured 2.9cm but some have them as large as grapefruits-- I felt devastated when I read and then the doc told me that fibroids could possibly impact fertility and cause miscarriages.

On the up side though I felt like we knew what was "wrong" now so we could fix it and give us more hope and potential for conceiving. The internal medicine doctor wanted to refer me to someone so I chose an OB/GYN that specialized in infertility. I met with her mid October, only to leave her office in tears because she didn't want to do anything right away. She said the best approach to take was a "wait and see approach." She wanted me to come back early December when she would do an ultrasound to determine if my fibroid had gotten any bigger. If it had, we would talk about removing it at that time. I left her office in tears because I was sooo frustrated and felt hopeless.

Even though I didn't want to I waited for my follow-up appointment with her. Long story longer, nothing happened in October and I started my cycle on October 26...the cycle that we would stop preventing had I stuck to my guns instead of changing my mind. And......

We conceived that cycle, naturally We "happened" to BD the morning of ovulation. Which I think, by divine intervention one way or another, just "happened" to be the day I ovulated very, very early in my cycle...CD10. If I hadn't been using the OPKs and never saw the actual surge I never would believed or known that I ovulated so early! I usually ovulated around CD 14, 15 even ovulated CD16 once.

I had no idea I was pregnant...didn't "feel" pregnant, had no early pregnancy signs apart for being extremely tired and hungry (thought I was getting sick). The only real hint that something was up was that my OPKs started getting lines and then positives on them starting on CD23. On 11/21/2006 I was out Christmas shopping with my mom at Target and decided for my peace of mind, because I KNEW I wasn't pregnant, I would get the cheapest test Target had just to see that BFN.

Well...I poas and to my utter shock it was a no doubt about it positive the second my pee hit the window! I kept saying to myself "NO WAY!" "NO WAY" as I watched the BFP come up. I absolutely, positively did not believe it, so my mom and I ran up to Walgreen’s to get more tests (Answer Quick and Simple and Clearblue Digitals)! Much to my surprise the first BFP was NOT a glitch...I got another positive that day on one of the Answer Tests, and another the day after, with FMU, and then three positive digitals!!!!!

I was nervous and scared waiting to tell Béla. I didn't want to tell him we were pregnant only to go on to have another loss and I wasn't quite sure how he would react. I even debated waiting until after my follow-up appointment with the OB/GYN to tell him based on what she had to say, but I absolutely couldn't wait that long.

Thanksgiving day my mother and I managed to run up to Walgreens on the guise of us needing something for dinner, to get more tests. I tested again that afternoon, and bot the regular two line tests and the digitals were positive! I decided that I had to "just do it" and as soon as my parents left our house after Thanksgiving Dinner I took Béla in the bedroom, sat him down on the bed and handed him not one, not two but three positive pregnancy tests, one right after the other The first words out of his mouth were "Could these be wrong?" or something like that and I told him not three tests and told him about the digitals, even offered to take a digital right then (I did though he didn't need me too, more to calm my nerves to make sure it still said "Pregnant" lol). He then got this huge smile on his face, stuck his thumbs in the air and said "Alright Baby Béla!"

37 loooong weeks of pregnancy and our son is finally here! There are just too many coincidences for it to be just a coincidence, which brings me to the conclusion that while I did not know the plan and while I was struggling God knew what was going to happen...He HAD a plan and His timing was perfect.

Cheri22 said...

Hi Jamie

Thanks so much for sharing your storey with me. It gave me goosebumps up and down my arms! (Thats a good thing by the way! lol)

I am so glad that you were able to recognize, that even though you went through your experience of a m/c, that things do happen for a reason. I can explain m/c in a spiritual sense that perhaps you will also feel better about. The picture of your son is gorgeous! Hes such a little cutie!

Jamie said...

Hi Cheri!

Thank you for your compliment on our little boy :-D

I forgot to say that you were one of the psychics I was refering to when I said in my post that I consulted with psychics about conception. You were absolutely dead on in your prediction, but the other psychic was not close at all. Funny thing is, I got a completely calm and trusting sense about you from the second I read your page and not about this other psychic that I had been in touch with before I found you.

At any rate...I would love for you to explain miscarriage to me in a spiritual sense. Next month (October 4) in our two year anniversary and although we now have the baby I yearned for so much, my heart still yearns for that baby we lost.